My neck, my back, one wrong turn and I felt a crack.

Try singing that to the Khia song “My Neck, My Back”. That’s how it sounds in my head, and that’s what’s keeping me from taking Jason’s expired Vicodin.

Jason and I went to Buffalo for his grandma’s 80th birthday, and ironically, I got my first old-person injury. You know the kind, the kind your parents complain of – making a slight movement, like in the garden or reaching for an eraser, and herniating a disc or misaligning whole portions of their spine.

I was simply attempting a Cirque du Soleil move with Jason in his parent’s basement during a game of pool. I jumped on his back, he bent forward, and I kicked my legs in the air behind me. As my back arched, I heard a crack-crack-crack.

I spent the rest of the weekend lying on the floor, listening to conversations. It was actually quite humbling. I’m a talker, so to be forced to remain out of sight was good for me. Still, I feel like I’ve been betrayed by my body for the first time, at age 28.

(I’m going to the chiro tomorrow, and should be fine – thanks for letting me talk like an old person too. This should be my dad’s blog, not mine. Hey pops, when are you setting up www.crankyoldfarmer.com?)

Humor level: cruel

Wednesday, I will have two of my favorite people (numbers 7 and 12) visiting!

(I’ve just finished Magical Thinking by Augusten Burroughs, so my humor level is set at CRUEL.

Shane and the parrot phone

We’re going to play Bohnanza and watch whales and eat food. I cannot wait. Oh, and I do not have a ranked list of my favorite people. You’re either in or out.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of my hand?

Some day, I’m going to look back through my blog archives, and wonder in astoundment the strange titles I chose, and how although they’re cryptically (or punfully) related, they don’t really give an indication of the post content. Thank Vishnu for full-text searching, eh?

Anyway, Jason says that kitten licks hurt. I think that’s hilarious.

Kittem licks

That is all.

Weird Library Science

I burnt my finger touching a pan that had recently been in the oven. I remedied it by applying a cold compress of Coors Light.

medicinal.JPG

That is all.
Today one of my co-libraricars found a DVD of Mean Girls,
which we do not own (because our copy was stolen long ago) with the barcode for Weird Science on it. Our copy of Weird Science is missing.

Did they think they could elude the security system by removing the barcode,
then putting it on a newer, more hip movie?

Also, My Friend Flicka was cataloged as being Sci Fi.

Such a weird day.

Untitled

It’s kind of amazing when little kids come in with their parents, and they say, “can I buy this book?”

Then again, I can’t complain about the consumerism of books, partly because buying books is a fine way to spend money (as opposed to hookers or sugar-free candy) and because it’s making my life a wee bit easier when it comes to deciding how many copies of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows I’m going to buy for the library.

I’ve been talking to kids who are already saving their money so they can buy it. I’ve been told that we’ll be inundated with donated copies after a few weeks, so for those two reasons, I’m not going to overbuy.

And for those of you who are not so interested in children’s librarian topics, I apologize. I swear that I’ll get back to posts about knitting and drinking too much (my two favorite vices) thusly.

Thoughts on stuff. Job stuff.

What I’m really enjoying about this job is the make-it-up-as-you-go-every-day thing. There is a huge supply of crafts, so I go down to the craft dungeon, and try to come up with cool stuff to do, and tie it in with some stories. So there’s that kind of creativity. Then there’s the creativity it takes to switch up my plans when I have too many / not enough / cranky / asleep / sobbing children at the program. I’m sure a lot of this will get easier as I do it more, but I’m wondering what the payoff will be. Now, if things go well, I’m elated. In a few years, will I have this much nervous energy? Will I be nonplussed by the antics of children? Will I loathe the websites and bands high schoolers are into?

Or will I become a driving force, unstoppable by any snotty nose or petulant look?

Storytime: colors

Storytime from last Friday.

Song: I’m a Little Teapot
Story: Samuel Todd’s Book of Great Colors
Song and dance: Color Square Dance (each kid got stickers denoting what colors they were, and we went over what the moves were)
Blue step forward, then turn around
Walk back to your place, and jump up and down.
Reds, hop to the middle, and back again
Find the yellows, and shake their hand.
Now purple you slowly turn around,
Clap your hands and make a sound.
Do-si-do, around we go,
All the colors, heel to toe.

Story: The Color Kittens
Rhyme: Color Rhyme
If your clothes have any red, put your finger on your head.
If your clothes have any blue, put your finger on your shoe.
If your clothes have any green, wave your hand so you are seen.
If your clothes have any yellow, smile like a happy fellow.
If your clothes have any brown, turn your smile into a frown.
If your clothes have any black, put your hands behind your back.
If your clothes have any white, stamp your feet with all your might.

Craft: Pre-cut crayons to color (from Copycat mag).

The same basic storytime was used today for the 1-3 year olds. It didn’t work as well. There was a massive age range, and they were mostly too young to engage with the color identification action. I’m thinking I’ll need to set some guidelines for what’s appropriate behavior – so there isn’t as much distraction.

Stretch
I’m a Little Teapot
Samuel Todd
Color Rhyme
Hickory Dickory Dock
Row Row
Of Colors and Things
Color Rhyme
I’m a Teapot
Hickory
Stretch

Storytime: Valentine’s Day, Redux

I fucking kicked storytime’s ASS.

Not only did I figure out how to arrange things so I used up 45 minutes perfectly, I had a hit after hit after hit, whilst dealing with new kids (unknown temperaments! wants to touch the pictures!) and a cold room.

I figured out how to keep the kids focused, or at least on the storytime rug, when they show up early. I’ve instituted kiddo yoga. Not that I call it that, but I thought maybe if we did some stretches, the kids would stop running around and screaming or being afraid and hiding in their mothers’ arms. I was right. Abbie told me about how one of her friends circumvented cranky kids by having them stretch. “Cranky (arms up) … stretching (arms to the ground)”. Anyway, by the time we were done stretching, everyone had arrived.

STORYTIME: Valentine’s Day (45 min.)
Stretching – arms up to the ceiling, up on tippy toes (if you have developed that balance), then out to the side, then down to the ground like a willow tree.

Rhyme: I’m a Little Valentine (to the tune of I’m a Little Teapot)

Song: Row Row Row Your Boat (seated)

Story: Who’s Baby Am I? by John Butler

Song/game: One Little, Two Little, Three Little Bubbles – the moms blew bubbles while we sang, and the kids popped bubbles. It worked really well for the young ones, and the older ones helped me sing along. Note: moms can’t blow bubbles and sing without hyperventilating or inhaling soap.

Song: Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes – first normal speed, then slow. I didn’t think they could do fast.

Story: The Best Thing about Valentines, by Eleanor Hudson

Craft: Valentines – I cut out shapes, and they scribbled with crayons.

Game: Valentine Hunt – I hid 3′ pom-poms all over the room, and the kids found them, ala Easter eggs.

Playtime