Last night my dream was much more weird than the night before. In this dream, I had stopped at a convenience store on my way to work, where I ran into Holly. We chatted and she told eye-rolling stories about Signs Now. The owner of the store was a letcherous-looking old man who kept trying to get into the conversation Holly and I were having. Holly left, and I was perusing the doughnuts when the owner came over and told me that he was going to kill my family if I didn’t perform a certain favor. I didn’t see what choice I had, but then realized that this guy probably didn’t know where my family lived, and if I went to the police, my family could be protected. I ran out of the store and into the parking lot where there happened to be a police car. I ran up to it and told the officer. He smiled a charming smile and handed me four quarters. He said “Go stand over there in that line, and we’ll get right to you.”<\/p>\n
I queued, and spent several hours in line. The line thinned out as people started giving up and going home. Finally, I was left with just one other person. I asked him what the quarters were for, and he said to buy (something; I don’t remember) and then he left. I wasn’t sure what to do, because if I left, the police wouldn’t help my family, but if I stayed, the fam could be hurt in the meantime.<\/p>\n
I left. I went to the safest place I could think of, which was an apartment several of my friends had. (These were friends I had in college: Jeff Oleshki, Jeremy Koch, and John Bowser.) I figured I’d be safe where there were big angry male friends who could fend off a crazed convenience store owner. They seemed indifferent to my story, which made me angry, and their attempts to calm me by offering me a turn with the PlayStation didn’t help.<\/p>\n
That, my friends, is where I woke up.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Last night my dream was much more weird than the night before. In this dream, I had stopped at a convenience store on my way to work, where I ran into Holly. We chatted and she told eye-rolling stories about Signs Now. The owner of the store was a letcherous-looking old man who kept trying […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[10],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-200","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-read-a-little-dream-of-me"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/outsidecat.com\/wordvehicle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/200","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/outsidecat.com\/wordvehicle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/outsidecat.com\/wordvehicle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/outsidecat.com\/wordvehicle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/outsidecat.com\/wordvehicle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=200"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/outsidecat.com\/wordvehicle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/200\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/outsidecat.com\/wordvehicle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=200"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/outsidecat.com\/wordvehicle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=200"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/outsidecat.com\/wordvehicle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=200"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}