I was always weirded out by the original. I understand the analogy to be that of a caring adult – ready to give the shirt off their back to make the next generation happier. I think that paradigm is outdated.

Kids are assholes with cell phones. With all the baby boomers, you’d think the we could rewrite the story. You come to the tree, it talks to you, it gives you some apples, you leave with the apples, then you come back and mulch it, then spray for tent worms.

Having friends with me helped. Laurie and Steph and I divvied up the tasks, and began walking around Champaign.

Steph would try to identify each tree, Laurie would photograph it, and I wrote down the latitude and longitude of each tree, along with the notes the other two observed. We rated the trees for climbability too.

And of course we had to try out the trees.

I tested out a particularly small-crotched locust (gasp?! yeah, we get to use the word ‘crotch’ a lot) on Neil Street, and came away a bit bloody.

A passerby asked if I had just won or lost a bet, and I explained the cataloging idea. I looked down and realized I was bleeding. Luckily, Steph is every bit a Girl Scout leader, and had environmentally-friendly baby wipes for me to get the blood and bark off of my skin.

I’m hoping to start figuring out this whole Google Maps thing soon. I’d also like to catalog a lot more trees. If anybody has a particular favorite, let me know!